Empathy refers to a person’s ability to put themselves in someone else’s shoes and then judge the situation; to be sensitive to what someone else might be going through — whether it is an experience or emotion.
As opposed to sympathy, it does not involve pitying someone. Instead, it enables an individual to better understand the needs and wants of another individual. This encourages all concerned to chalk out a strategy which protects the rights and interests of an individual without jeopardising that of another. In other words, it creates a win-win situation.
For instance, when I was in class VI, one of my classmates, Farhan, struggled with reading and writing, although he was considered to be a conscientious student because he always listened to the class lecture attentively and spoke politely to everyone. But when he read, he stammered a lot and when he wrote, he would often put “b” as “p” and vice versa.
Empathy helps us understand others and respond in a positive and proactive manner
Thus, our then English language teacher called his parents to discuss his progress. Much to Farhan’s relief, she was not annoyed with him. Instead, she appreciated his enthusiasm and willingness to improve. At the same time, however, she pointed out that a learning disorder called Dyslexia might be hindering Farhan’s ability to read and write.
Medical tests proved that she was correct. It was followed by personalised coaching by a reading specialist and the school management also extended some special relaxations to him so that he may cope with the academic demands.
One year on, Farhan had visibly improved. He recited poems to the class confidently and composed brilliant essays.
What was it that enabled Miss Asma to identify the problem? Empathy. Rather than labelling him as “dull” and “lazy”, she tried to figure out what kept him from achieving fluency despite his best efforts. A less empathetic teacher would have discouraged him and he might have given up studies altogether.
Empathy, however, is not restricted to education, it plays a role in all spheres of life. It was empathy that drove Sir Syed Ahmed Khan to initiate the Aligarh Movement that was aimed at educating the Muslims for their socio-economic uplift. He realised that Muslims at that time were in a state of despair owing to lack of education. He could feel their pain and wanted to alleviate it to whatever extent he possibly could. If it were not for his efforts, Muslims would have become slaves to Hindus who were far more advanced in terms of education and Pakistan would never have come into being.
It was empathy that drove the Quaid-i-Azam to fight for a separate homeland as he was aware of and had seen the hardships faced by Muslims under British Raj. It is empathy that enables one person to control their anger when they hear harsh words from another. The other person may be going through an ordeal that made them bitter.
In a nutshell, let’s all learn to empathise with others so as to make life better for everyone and, resultantly, for ourselves too.
Published in Dawn, Young World, July 6th, 2019
