That last day of college was itself a memory. The air felt heavier, the corridors shorter, the college building quieter... as if everything was bidding us farewell.
Friends smiled and every smile felt a bit deeper, warmer and sadder. Professors patted our backs, but every pat felt heavier. As we clicked our farewell moments, I could sense the gloom the camera couldn’t capture. The dusty tables, the scribbled walls, the dented whiteboard... all those flashbacks spread an eerie silence amongst us.
Finally, we were going to be graduates. But surprisingly, we felt no excitement. It seemed like quite ‘mourning’ for us, like what we witness at funerals. And that day, I realised, growing older wasn’t a pleasant journey, rather a series of small, sad, but eternal, goodbyes.
That day, I realised that college was not just an educational centre, it was a second home for me. And soon, I found myself preparing for university admissions, submitting forms and filling applications.
Everyone at my home was excited — I was going to my dream medical college. But deep inside, a strange hollow lingered. Was I even ready for university?
While my relatives could see the ‘energy and confidence growing inside me’, I shyly searched for the enthusiasm of other university students. That aura, that contagious flair, was a distant star that my eyes couldn’t find.
Days passed and soon it would be my first day in a university. A mix of emotions now struck me. On the one hand, I felt lucky. Finally, I was at the doorstep of professional career. No longer a ‘mere student — spoon-fed by parents, scolded by teachers, taunted by bullies. But then, I was afraid. Deeply afraid. Would I get the same type of friends? Would I manage to fit in and adapt in the new environment?
The first day of university felt as sudden as the last day of college. I didn’t feel anything different inside me. It just reminded me of my first day of school, the same old Ibrahim, with a bag pack on my shoulder, a forced smile on the face. The tall building shadowed me, welcoming me into a place feeling so unfamiliar. I was hesitant, as if I was a visitor in someone else’s story.
Introductions started, names were exchanged and conversations lit up. Seniors welcomed us to the ‘new phase’ of education, of which nothing felt exciting to me. Professors took the podium and their voices reminded me of the dear teachers I had left in college. There were so many new faces, new perspectives... leaving me overwhelmed.
But that day, something subtle hit me..., I realised I was not alone in the battle. All around me, there was nervousness and unfamiliarity. Everyone was trying to adapt to the new setting. Perhaps university life wasn’t as easy as we had dreamt.
As days turned into weeks, I started adapting — at least from the outside. It was all I could do. University never gave us an opportunity to think, connect and relate. An overwhelming workload of assignments, projects and tests crashed onto our study desks. I soon found myself struggling to breathe and survive in the new routine. It was all so exhausting.
But more than academic pressure, what struck me painfully was the atmosphere. There was so much duality, hypocrisy and superficiality. Everyone was trying to act the best version of themselves. Curated Instagram stories, branded clothes, forced laughter in café selfies, it was all so artificial. There was a lot more interaction, but little connections.
People heard not to understand, but to respond. Conversations felt rehearsed, as if everyone was here to sell the best version of themselves. And in all that noise, I felt quite.
Looking back now, I wish I had lived every moment, every celebration, and every memory of my school and college life to the fullest. To all those students who are worrying about school exams, scribbling diary memories, enjoying college sports and surviving academic load, I would request them to slow down. Don’t rush at this stage. Live your life to the fullest.
Learn to be happy — cheer, learn and enjoy. And tomorrow, when you step into your professional career, do not mask your true identities. Avoid losing yourself behind filters and thriving to meet others’ expectations. The world needs authenticity, not perfection. Accept your flaws and strengths.
Smile, but with originality. Appreciate others but do not flatter. Rise, not by suppressing others, but by raising them. Be original. Be kind. Be proud of who you are.
Published in Dawn, Young World, July 5th, 2025
